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George Lucas loved Darth Vader's "Nooooooooo!" in Episode III so much that he added two more for the Blu Ray release of Return of the Jedi.

I'm pretty sure that all of my dreams have just come true. An attractive blonde girl is playing the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers theme song while dressed as the original Pink Ranger, and she's doing it just for me.

Is it creepy that I'm 24 and she looks like a high school senior? Sure, maybe in America. But, as I've said before, we Canadians are sexual deviants (the age of consent here is 16). Plus, this girl is Australian and I read somewhere that young Australian girls are legally obligated to have sex with handsome Canadian strangers. It's in their constitution.

I'm not sure how I missed this, but the last two episodes of Mortal Kombat Legacy finally featured Scorpion and Sub Zero.

The series' quality has been mixed so far, partly due to the mixture of styles they use between episodes which range from good (Raiden in an insane asylum and Johnny Cage as a former Power Ranger) to very bad (Kitana and Mileena's backstory). It's really hard to screw up the two most famous ninjas in Mortal Kombat mythology, though, and thankfully for Kevin Tancharoen's series part one above does a great job of setting up the story and part two (on the next page) is blessedly all action. Plus, no shitty animated sequences!

Continue Reading . . .

I’ve been too tired to update the last couple of days, which really says a lot toward how lazy I am. Literally all I do each day is look at shit online and post whatever I like the most here with some half-assed witty remark. I am too tired to do that, ladies and chicks-with-dicks. This is why I’ll never have children.

But I found this a few days ago: it’s an animated short by Disney animator Robb Pratt in the style of the classic Superman serial (Pratt also worked on Pocahontas, Hercules and Fantasia 2000). I really love traditional animation, so here it is. You want a funny joke to go with it? I threw up on a church yesterday because God makes me sick.

• Robb Pratt’s homepage

As promised, the first episode of the Mortal Kombat Legacy web series went up today courtesy of Machinima. My verdict? It’s pretty good. Not spectacular, but a good start.

I have to post a retraction for Sunday’s post, though. I was wrong: apparently it wasn’t Stryker in the teaser but Kano sans his mechanical eye. Stryker is in the first episode, however, played by Karl "Helo" Agathon from Battlestar Galactica. I know that’s not his real name, but Tahmoh Penikett is so fucking hard to spell.

• Watch Mortal Kombat Legacy on YouTube

It’s been a slow day unless you count the earthquake and tsunami that hit Japan, and all I can come up with for that are a few Dragon Ball Z-related jokes. So here’s a great video from College Humor that’s way better than its source material. Seriously, why do people like Star Fox? Even when the games were fun they were still annoying, and now it’s like every developer that touches the franchise has made a bet with Nintendo that it can turn Star Fox into a proper lady before the débutante ball. Or a banging hottie before prom, depending on which movie you’re watching. Either way, it keeps turning out more like Carrie than 10 Things I Hate About You.